[thelist] Late-night call for opinions

[Michael Buffington]

On the "Welcome to the party after the party note" I'll share a personal
experience that may help inspire Martin:

My younger brother was far to young to be drinking, and took it way too far
at a party, and ended up in intensive care, his stomach being pumped dry
several times, slipping in and out of a coma for three weeks.

If he drinks alcohol, or has any type of food or medicine with alcohol in
it, it's likely he will develop a raging ulcer and spend the rest of his
life eating oatmeal, or his pancraeas will burst, or worse yet, end up dead.

"Welcome to the party after the party, where you see the contents of your
stomach sucking through a tube, and artificial bile is pumped into your gall
bladder. Have a blast while you slip into and out of a coma while loved ones
sit and wait with white knuckles. Don't worry about controlling your bodily
functions, that's what the cather is for! And you'll have a staff of
friendly nurses to feed you lunch through your IV."

That might make an impact with "invincible" teens.

Michael Buffington
http://www.michaelbuffington.com
mike at stompzine.com
cell. (714) 404-8616
home. (949) 457-2247

-----Original Message-----
From: iibiz
To: thelist at lists.evolt.org
Sent: 8/12/01 7:16 PM
Subject: Re: [thelist] Late-night call for opinions

> Comments... Please... As many as possible on anything and everything.
> Take it apart, dissect and criticise... And please don't forget to
> mention some of the good things.
>
> The url to begin with is
> http://www.partyprogram.com/introduction/index.html.
>

Martin,

First of all - overall a very nice site!

A few things I would think about:

#1 - I like the pictures on the Experiences and Risks pages.  Not so
wild
about the ones on the main page (hand) and the one on the Trauma page
(bag
of blood).  Not sure what the hand is even supposed to symbolize.......

#2 - Risk page is missing the navigation buttons.

#3 - I'm guessing your target audience ranges somewhere between the ages
of
8ish to 18ish.....the "kids" in the background image, though cute, are
going
to turn off the kids starting around 12 or 13.  Trust me.  I have 12 and
18
year old daughters.  Maybe just use a solid background or look for
something
a little less "grade-school-ish".

#4 - "Death of An Innocent" - tear rendering story that my 12 year old
ran
across years ago and tried to read it to me.  She had a hard time
talking
thru her own tears.  Some people may give you a hard time about that
being
in there - leave it!  Makes a definite impact on children who by nature
just
seem to think they're immortal.

#5 - Love the "Trauma" page.  So much so that I would move some of it to
the
main page.  Would make much more of an impact.  Older kids will read the
"What is a party to you?", ending in vomiting and go "yeah"!  Something
that
would make more of an impact (on all ages) would be:

"Welcome to the Party After the Party!" (or something like that) and
then
put some of the "Trauma" content there.    Oh.....or even make it like
an
invitation:

Place:  Your local hospital
Time:   Too late
Attire:  Don't worry - we'll provide an ugly gown for you!
RSVP to:  Your parents

Maybe I'm going to far there, but maybe it sparked the perfect wording
in
your head to make more impact from the main page.  You gotta grab these
kids
quickly.  Attention spans are minimal!

Just my .02........

Sandy




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