[thechat] Tora Bora - Parliamo Glasgow?

Martin martin at members.evolt.org
Mon Dec 10 17:16:55 CST 2001


Anyone else (John H?) familiar with Parliamo Glasgow?

Here's an excerpt. The Chapter is 'Dining out'

Lecturer (posh voice): Let me translate and explain the delicate
nuances of the words and phrases used in the cafe.
When the young man arrives to dine, he does not hear
the waitress' sotto voce observation:
	AURABLIDDIPEST
This word is traditionally voiced by waitresses in eating
houses to indicate that the establishment is about to
close for the night and the prospective diner is not
wholly welcome... Neverless, the waitress endeavours
to ascertain the customer's requirements with the simple
query:
	WHIDDJEFUR?
Note the prefix "WHIDDJE". We use this generally in the
imperitive sense, that is, when asking an important question.
Accordingly, a young lady may say to her escort, or 'lumbur':
	WHIDDJEWAANT?
	WHIDDJEDAEN?
	WHIDDJEHINKA UM?
Of course, if her lumbur is unduly amourous, the maiden
may reinforce her inquiry with the more emphatic phrase:
	NUNNARAT... CURRITOOT!
(etc - more samples at
http://pages.about.com/mac20anne/scotlandsmahame/id30.html )

But what's this got to do with Tora Bora (bin Laden's assumed
hideout). It sounds to me like TORA BORA is actually from the
Parliamo Glasgow lexicon, as part of the compound verb
	GOAN TORABORA.

Here's an example. The scene is where a young lady is picked
up by her escort for the evening. She has obviously made an
effort in her appearance. However, her swain reproves her
with the admonishment she
	SHUDNYA GOAN TORABORA
because he had merely planned on
	GWINTY RAPICHERS ANHENWULL GOFUR AHOFURTU
She, of course, is mortified by the suggestion of such a
limited soiree, and declares that she would not want to be
seen in public  next to someone
	STAUNIN ERRINYUR SIMMIT
and, slamming the door, prematurely concludes the date with
that characteristic cry marking the end of so many Glasgovian
romances:
	GONTAKKARINNINJUMPTIYERSEL!

Cheers
Martin
(a hell of a long email for a short gag. Maybe I shouldn't
have gone torabora)
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