[thelist] Kids on the net

[Neroli Endacott]

TERRIFIC ANSWER DAVE!!!!!!
Absolutely great parenting skills put in place.
Reflecting what children say is a fabulous way of letting them know you 
are listening and encourages feedback and knowledge of what is happening
in 
their little lives.
Trust - HUGE and important factor - well placed and done right is a most

successful way of parenting.
I did not mean to sound negative - or show a lack of trust.
The children I care for have already been severely damaged by "the BIG
people" 
in their lives.
I need to be very careful with their Net usage and am accountable for
their
Safety.
Many have had to live on the streets or survive by any means and they
THINK they are 'adult' or 'in control' of any situation at their tender
ages.
They think they are invincible and no one can 'touch them'.

One teenager found out the hard way - the net can be an intrusive and
hurtful
place if not used sensibly and with care. (This was at a friends place
where 
net access was allowed anywhere at any time and to go anywhere online)
I thank God I had encouraged an honesty and gained her trust 
(not an easy task to achieve from children whose trust in adults has
been abused)
And she came home and shared with me what had transpired.

A good learning curve for both of us.

She is now training as a Graphic Designer and has a good sense of online
usage.
Now finds her classmates (rather than 'strangers') online are fun to
chat with.
We also went through the "everyone else can stay online all night" stage
but she 
accepts bedtimes remain intact and chats finish a half hour before
bedtime and 
we get time to talk about what she has been doing - all is good!

I still believe rules need to be set and these will differ for each
individual 
and circumstances.
We 'set the rules' within Family Conferences - so all children are able
to add
their thoughts and no one feels they are left out and all children feel
they have 
some say.

It is reassuring to hear other parents do care and are educating their
children 
to be safe on the net.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

Neroli