[thelist] helpful responses (was RE: asp.net: A better way to post back from text)

VOLKAN ÖZÇELİK volkan.ozcelik at gmail.com
Mon Dec 5 14:31:42 CST 2005

> thelist has mood swings, but hopefully the overall spirit is
> helpfulness.

Just one bit of addition. Although everybody knows this, I'm sure,
it's worth a tip. Besides I owe a tip to the list because of a former
off-topic thread.

<tip author="Volkan Ozcelik" type="self-control">
You may not be in a helpful mood always. You may have argued with your
boss, your gal/boy-friend, you may be sick, you may feel yourself
unenergetic and de-motivated, whatever.

If you are in such a mood and you want/need to respond one's question
so that you may be helpful to him/her, just ask the following to
yourself before taking any action:

1. Will my response really help this individual, or is it just
fulfilling my emotions and my ego? (this ist the most important one,
repeat it several times)
2. Can I state the question in a better way? (this is important as well)
3. If I were the correspondent, what would be my feelings/reaction
when I received that response?
5. Is it a better approach to send my thoughts, off-list?

Then *before* sending your message re-read it at least *thrice*
removing all emotional expressions out of the message. Does the
message still convey the same amount of information?

If the answer is "no" GOTO step 1.

If you are really really not in your mood. Or you have some negative
emotions against the correspondent, wait and calm down before starting
to type.

If you cannot; either do not respond at all or kindly tell a fellow
friend (off-list) to inform the person

Volkan Ozcelik
+>Yep! I'm blogging! : http://www.volkanozcelik.com/volkanozcelik/blog/
+> My projects/studies/trials/errors : http://www.sarmal.com/

More information about the thelist mailing list