[thelist] site check please

[Dan Stockton]

Sales @ Lycosa wrote:
> Would anyone.. give.. a look?.. thoughts.. welcome!
> .. Thanks.
> http://www.oystonautos.co.uk/
> 
> Kind regards,
> Phil Parker

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May I suggest:

1-there should be many more words, especially on the front page

_- '/index.htm' content is exactly the same as '/news.htm'
  Change that. The front page should contain a summary/overview of 'what 
this company/website offers'. Sure, keep the "We are recruiting" on the 
front page (even keep it at the top, if it's better there) but instead 
of following with the full text of the news page, make a "(read more..)" 
link to the news page.

_- your gallery should prob'ly have more photos in order to be most 
effective.. make a link from '/car-showroom.htm' to '/gallery.htm' + a 
link from '/car-sales.htm' to both showroom and gallery.. and others, 
too (I realize there's already a link in the menu and rightmenu but 
links should also be interspersed among the copy) - (put rightmenu at 
the top)

  Also there should be " at Bridlington Bay Road, Carnaby, East 
Yorkshire." after "Come and visit our superb new car showroom" (do you 
want to emphasize the fact that this is a "new showroom" or that it's 
just a showroom for "new cars"? I suspect the former and would therefore 
suggest to remove 'car ' from that sentence.. and possibly also add ".. 
or visit our {a href="/gallery.htm">Virtual Showroom or something)

_- list a sampling of services on '/car-service.htm' (not necessarily as 
a substitute for but as a supplement to the 'service-menu.pdf', not 
necessarily a complete list but a partial list of just some of the 
(biggest/best/most attractive/favorite/bestselling/whatever) services 
and then ".. and many more! (Download full service menu)" or something

_- what is MOT ? (maybe explain that, benefits, features, what makes 
your MOT service better than others, etc)

_- list a sampling of services on '/car-wash-valet.htm' (not necessarily 
as a substitute for but as a supplement to the 'valet-menu.pdf', not 
necessarily a complete list but a partial list of just some of the 
(biggest/best/most attractive/favorite/bestselling/whatever) services 
and then ".. and many more! (Download full valet menu)" or something

  Not only just a list of services but incorporate them into your 
content (i.e. instead of: "We have a great team working in the valet 
department. They will wash and clean your vehicle thoroughly." try, for 
example: "Our team of friendly and detail-oriented valet personnel will 
thoroughly steam clean, hand wash and shampoo the complete exterior of 
your vehicle, vacuum the interior, clean the glass and more")

_- more on the contact page such as "Our polite and knowledgeable sales 
staff are eager to discuss your requirements in the privacy of our 
comfortable sales room."

2- Place a link to '/book-service.htm' and '/book-mot.htm' on the 
contact page, use a form instead of a mailto link for contacting sales 
(it's more user-friendly and spambot unaccommodating)

-Dan

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