[thelist] When life and coding are incompatible...?

Fri Nov 10 08:18:19 CST 2000

> [sender: Ben Henick || date: 04:51 09/11/2000 -0800]
> >Let me paint for you a scenario:

I will attempt to preserve the signal:noise ratio by summing up the
advice in the thread as a tip, where it will probably do the most good.

I am... surprised and touched at the sincerity of the responses I've
gotten both on- and offlist.  I know that several of you recognize my
address from earlier flurries of productive activity on MJ, and only
wish that I was making as significant a contribution here!  *chuckle*

For those of you who might have wondered the event at hand is
(thankfully) not a death of any sort.  Then too the client whose
timeline is most affected by the situation has been notified, and has
been entirely understanding.  After talking to him I realize that part
of my stress has to do with the fact that I want to see it finished (if
anything) more badly than he does!

The matter at hand I shall call one of personal revelation; the subject
matter is such that I really don't want to discuss it publicly.  My
(increasingly outdated) personal site touches on parts.

I think I'm starting to get my bearings back, and the response to this
thread has had a lot to do with that.

Another thing I should mention is that my MP3 collection has been
something of a godsend, even if I haven't gotten much work done.  I've
instead tried to do intuitive stuff like phone calls and copywriting.

One (rhetorical) question I have:  I'm working out of the house
presently, which has made it more difficult... when you're freelancing,
what then?

<tip type="Managing personal difficulty">
Every once in a while life catches up with us at times that do no
favors for our deadlines.  Here is a list of "Do's:"
1.  Talk to someone.  Finding an objective voice will help to put
matters in perspective.
2.  Compartmentalize.  If that means that you're a workaholic, then
maybe you should take some time off at home.  If you can, keep work at
work and home at home.
3.  Rest.  If you push yourself that much harder, you are in fact 
bringing upon yourself a cycle of illness that only makes matters
worse.
4.  Make a conscious effort to make your Web usage productive.  Time
will fly, will get pissed away, if you don't.
5.  Did I mention talking?
6.  Focus on resolving some of your more intense project challenges. 
this can help to provide needed distance from you and whatever the
problem happens to be.  Do be careful to manage your time if you do
this.
7.  Change your routine enough to provide some needed variety.  At the
very least, interact.
There are also a couple of "Don't's:"
1.  Do not medicate with drugs or alcohol as a direct response to the
situation.
2.  If you're hurting in some way don't, please DON'T, "bottle it in." 
This can be difficult in circumstances where you've not much of a
social life (and thus no friends with whom you'd trust the relevant
emotion)... and in that event, visit the pastor (or other spiritual
mentor) of a friend.  If it's too intense to bear, that's probably for
a reason, and you're being foolish to try and bear it alone anyway.
</tip>

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