[thelist] trash my new site pls

[Miriam Frost]

Hi, Joe!

Nice start, and I hope this doesn't sound like I'm harshing out on you. Most
of my questions were/are regarding copy, I think that's where you really
could improve things --

Why do you need to "confess" that you're a dreamer? Why not just say it? Or
if you're looking for work with this site, is that what you really want to
convey? I mean, to a lot of potential employers, that might sound like
they're going to get someone they need to prod a lot...

D.T.P.? Desktop publishing? That's a pretty unusual acryonym - what if you
just spell it out?

What does "Trespassers to be enlightened" mean? Oh. Got it. Not shot.
Enlightened about what?

Typography section -- from my experience, when I see a link named this on a
designer's site, I think I'm going to see fonts that they've designed. What
is your goal with this section? Who is Charles Bigelow? (Yes, I know, but do
your potential clients? Why should they care?)

"The evolving art of messing with photos" --  err. What?
There's a typo at the bottom of the page - "especialy" shb. "especially."
I've really liked your photography throughout, but you might take another
look at a lot of the copy. It might be a little punchier, and more effective
if it flows logically form one paragraph to the next.

The red background on your illustration in the bottom right corner does not
match the red of the page. On the about you page (I like the way the
illustration is in color now!), the backrounds on all the links are grey,
you might want to think about consistency here.

Err... say someone wants to hire you -- how do they get in touch? Maybe I
missed it but I'm not seeing any contact information...


Hope that was helpful, and good luck!

best regards,
Miriam


--
http://www.dynagirl.com
making the fun go to 11 since 1971