[thechat] no point being pessimistic, it probably wouldn't work anyway

[rudy]

The old folks are sitting around the lobby of the home.

One old guy says to the old girl beside him, "Bet you can't guess how old I
am."

She says, "Sure I can. Pull down your pants and I'll tell you."

"Huh?"  So he pulls down his pants, and she says, "91."

The man says, "Wow, that's right! How did you do that?"

"You told me this morning."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MAJOR U.S. RESEARCH UNIVERSITY DISCOVERS NEW ELEMENT!

The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered by
investigators at a major U.S. research university. The element, tentatively
named Administratium, has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic
number of 0. However, it does have 1 neutron, 125 assistant neutrons, 75
vice neutrons, and 111 assistant vice neutrons. This gives it an atomic mass
of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by a force that involves the
continuous exchange of meson-like particles called morons. It is also
surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since it has no electrons, Administratium is inert. However, it can be
detected chemically as it impedes every reaction it comes in contact with.
According to the discoverers, a minute amount of Administratium causes one
reaction to take over four days to complete when it would have normally
occurred in less than one second.

Administratium has a normal half-life of approximately three years, at which
time it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which
assistant neutrons, vice neutrons, and assistant vice neutrons exchange
places.

In fact, an Administratium sample's mass actually INCREASES over time, since
with each reorganization some of the morons inevitably become neutrons,
forming new isotopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to speculate
that perhaps Administratium is spontaneously formed whenever morons reach a
certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to
as "critical morass."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Deja Moo -- the feeling that you've heard this bull before