[thechat] Mostly (was: Handling a knife like a pro) (was: Cooked carrots)

[Erik Mattheis]

On Thursday, February 27, 2003, at 10:51  PM, Sabrina Dent,
Apperception wrote:
> Which is why we need activists to tell kids that's bollocks? And why
> we need
> to educate them that sexual readiness INCLUDES being ready to obtain
> safer
> sex supplies? Hello?

We are actually agreeing here. Sorry if you took it otherwise.

> If you're planning to participate in a*al ri*ng, since you should have
> a
> fairly wide piece of latex, ala a dental dam, or a big swatch of Saran
> Wrap
> over your arse, this isn't an issue. See? Safer sex education in
> action.

Aw, that takes all the FUN out of it! I could achieve the same effect
with saran wrap, a cantaloupe and microwave oven.

>> I believe that on an individual level, the vast majority of the human
>> race has felt this way forever ... people that haven't probably have
>> larger problems, like low self-esteem or Catholicism.
>
> That's nice. It's also crap. I take it you're not answering Dear Abby
> letters about sex on a daily basis or dealing with teenagers distraught
> about their sexuality issues every hour, either.

Would you disagree that the majority of sex-related distresses stem
from a thought "I can't let myself feel this way / I don't deserve
this", etc? People that are afraid of commitment think they don't
deserve commitment from another, people that are freaked out about
being attracted to their own sex care more about their
parent's/society's/whatever's image of them than their image of
themselves ... etc. etc. I'd bet my bottom dollar that most (a BIG most
of) sexual hang ups go hand in hand with generally putting the approval
of others over approving of one's self.

>> I don't have a TV, so don't watch any daytime TV, but my understanding
>> is that such things are it's meat and potatoes.
>
> Oh, yeah, dude. Porn for women is just so mainstream (not)

So you're advocating that woman use porn? To what end? Most of my
female friends use porn ... most of them prose ... I think it's because
I run with a crowd that generally is comfortable with pursuing whatever
it is they feel like, not because they heed any taboo ... a caveat, I
do admit I'm an elitist ... however from everyone below me, I think
they'd be better off if someone taught them to accept their stupidity
rather than become comfortable using porn.

(My friend Mandy was the editor of CHIC until it was axed - funniest
quote from her - when she was trying to get me to write an advice
column for it: "Keep in mind that most of our readers are in prison or
are Southern pig farmers.")

>  and poly has been
> mentioned/portrayed/sung about in mass media about, oh, 50 times at
> last
> glance at the running list of such sightings.

Does "poly" mean simultaneously having multiple partners?

If so, I assume you are tacitly excluding country and rap music from
the "mass media".

As far as newspapers and TV news shows: this is not news because it's
not news. Headlines like "Husband Has Multiple Lovers, Wife Files for
Divorce" and "Circle of Gay Friends All Have Sex with Each Other and
Everyone is Happy" only increase circulation for publications like The
Onion.

> There was no sex in Harold and Maude. There was love and a post-coital
> shot,
> but not sheet rollage. I don't know when the last time you picked up a
> women's magazine (or a men's magazine) might be, but trust me: people
> portrayed as "sexy" by our mass media are *very much* of the "beautiful
> people" type. That pressure is far more severe if you're a woman.
>
> And Chasing Amy? Yeah. It doesn't matter what the story line is, Ben
> Affleck
> and Joey Lauren Adams are hardly unattractive people. Have you just
> entirely
> abandoned your critical thinking cap?

No, my thinking cap is firmly on and I assert that, "A Hollywood cliché
goes 'Beginning as a shallow individual, our hero realizes that true
love can not be predicted by that someone's  social status, sex,
beauty, age, or anything else other than the person themselves just as
they are.'"

You know, Sabrina, combativeness is often a sign that people's feelings
for one another are so strong that that they enter freak out mode to
they extent that the subconscious chooses for them to perceive disdain
towards oneanother until one day they mistakenly end up at the same
party, and lock themselves in the bathroom until their passion has
exhausted them.

<em>
although an ocean lay between
I feel her heartbeat as if
it were my own saturated
pulse of desire
</em>

That is the first poem I've written for anybody. Seriously. Took
perhaps 15-20 seconds, like it was inside my heart my whole life just
waiting to come out. I kinda think I was subconsciously thinking about
my best friend's girlfriend and my own sister, though.
-----------------------
Erik Mattheis
GoZz Digital
<http://goZz.com/>
Flash and ColdFusion Development
Minneapolis, MN
-----------------------