[thechat] Vegetarian food in US restaurants

rudy rudy937 at rogers.com
Sat May 3 17:01:58 CDT 2003


> For heaven's sake, is it that hard for chefs there
> to cook real vegetarian food?

heck no, it's a piece of cake (no pun intended)


Dupea: I'd like a plain omelette, no potatoes, tomatoes instead, a cup of
coffee, and wheat toast.

Waitress: (She points to the menu) No substitutions.

Dupea: What do you mean? You don't have any tomatoes?

Waitress: Only what's on the menu. You can have a number two - a plain
omelette. It comes with cottage fries and rolls.

Dupea: Yeah, I know what it comes with. But it's not what I want.

Waitress: Well, I'll come back when you make up your mind.

Dupea: Wait a minute. I have made up my mind. I'd like a plain omelette, no
potatoes on the plate, a cup of coffee, and a side order of wheat toast.

Waitress: I'm sorry, we don't have any side orders of toast...an English
muffin or a coffee roll.

Dupea: What do you mean you don't make side orders of toast? You make
sandwiches, don't you?

Waitress: Would you like to talk to the manager?

Dupea: ...You've got bread and a toaster of some kind?

Waitress: I don't make the rules.

Dupea: OK, I'll make it as easy for you as I can. I'd like an omelette,
plain, and a chicken salad sandwich on wheat toast, no mayonnaise, no
butter, no lettuce. And a cup of coffee.

Waitress: A number two, chicken sal san, hold the butter, the lettuce and
the mayonnaise. And a cup of coffee. Anything else?

Dupea: Yeah. Now all you have to do is hold the chicken, bring me the toast,
give me a check for the chicken salad sandwich, and you haven't broken any
rules.

Waitress (spitefully): You want me to hold the chicken, huh?

Dupea: I want you to hold it between your knees.

Waitress (turning and telling him to look at the sign that says, "No
Substitutions") Do you see that sign, sir? Yes, you'll all have to leave.
I'm not taking any more of your smartness and sarcasm.

Dupea: You see this sign? (He sweeps all the water glasses and menus off the
table.)


rudy



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